Would you like to react to this message? Create an account in a few clicks or log in to continue.


Come, register and JOIN today - you'll have fun - QUARANTEED =) Bring your friends also - the more the merrier =D
 
HomePortalGallerySearchLatest imagesRegisterLog in

 

 A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN

Go down 
3 posters
AuthorMessage
MissHaHa
LMAO!
LMAO!
MissHaHa


Posts : 127
Join date : 2007-07-23
Age : 47
Location : Australia

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitimeThu Jul 26, 2007 4:27 am

A WOMAN'S GUIDE TO WHAT A MAN IS REALLY SAYING:


I'M HUNGRY.
I'm hungry.

I'M SLEEPY.
I'm sleepy.

I'M TIRED.
I'm tired.

I'VE GOTTA GO.
Get out of the way and stay away until it clears.

WHAT'S WRONG?
I don't see why you're making such a big deal out of this.

WHAT'S WRONG?
What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now?

YES, I LIKE THE WAY YOU CUT YOUR HAIR.
I liked it better before.

YES, I LIKE THE WAY YOU CUT YOUR HAIR.
$50 and it doesn't look that much different!

YES, I LIKE THE WAY YOU CUT YOUR HAIR.
For $50 they should have GIVEN YOU hair!

LET'S TALK, HONEY.
I'm trying to impress you by showing you that I am a deep person, and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me.

WILL YOU MARRY ME?
I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys.

WILL YOU MARRY ME?
I might as well get tax benefits for going through these talks.
Back to top Go down
The SAINT
LMAO! Platinum member
LMAO! Platinum member
The SAINT


Posts : 736
Join date : 2007-11-03
Age : 114
Location : hoping i can come back soon.........

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: Re: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitimeSat Nov 03, 2007 1:47 am

How to Impress a Woman
Wine her, Dine her, Call her, Hug her,
Hold her, Surprise her, Compliment her,
Smile at her, Laugh with her,
Cry with her, Cuddle with her,
Shop with her, Give her jewelry,
Buy her flowers, Hold her hand,
Write love letters to her,
Go to the end of the earth and back for her.

How to Impress a Man
Show up naked.
Bring beer.
Back to top Go down
The SAINT
LMAO! Platinum member
LMAO! Platinum member
The SAINT


Posts : 736
Join date : 2007-11-03
Age : 114
Location : hoping i can come back soon.........

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: Re: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitimeThu Nov 08, 2007 10:33 pm

How do you know if you're in love, lust, or marriage?

LOVE when your eyes meet across a crowded room
LUST when your tongues meet across a crowded room
MARRIAGE when your belt won't meet around your waist, and you don't care

LOVE when intercourse is called making love
LUST all other times
MARRIAGE what's intercourse?

LOVE when you argue over how many children to have
LUST When you argue over who gets the wet spot
MARRIAGE when you argue over money

LOVE when you share everything you own
LUST when you think twice about giving your partner bus money
MARRIAGE when the bank owns everything

LOVE when it doesn't matter if you don't climax
LUST when the relationship is over if you don't climax
MARRIAGE what's a climax?

LOVE when you phone each other just to say "Hi"
LUST when you phone each other just to organize sex
MARRIAGE when you phone each other to find out what time your son's game starts

LOVE when you write poems about your partner
LUST when all you write is your phone number
MARRIAGE when all you write are check's

LOVE when you show concern for your partners' feelings
LUST when you couldn't give a rip
MARRIAGE when your only concern is what's on TV

LOVE when your farewell is "I love you darling"
LUST when your farewell is "So, same time next week?"
MARRIAGE when your farewell is silent

LOVE when you are proud to be seen in public with your partner
LUST when you only ever see each other in the bedroom
MARRIAGE when you never see each other awake

LOVE when your heart flutters every time you see them
LUST when your groin twitches every time you see them
MARRIAGE when your wallet empties every time you see them

LOVE when nobody else matters
LUST when nobody else knows
MARRIAGE when everybody else matters and you don't care who knows

LOVE when all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel
LUST when it's just the same mushy old crap
MARRIAGE when you never listen to music

LOVE when breaking up is something you try not to think about
LUST when staying together is something you try not to think about
MARRIAGE when just getting through today is your only thought

LOVE when you're interested in everything your partner does
LUST when you're only interested in one thing
MARRIAGE when you're not interested in what your partner does and the one thing you're interested in is your golf score
Back to top Go down
The SAINT
LMAO! Platinum member
LMAO! Platinum member
The SAINT


Posts : 736
Join date : 2007-11-03
Age : 114
Location : hoping i can come back soon.........

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: Re: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitimeWed Nov 14, 2007 2:04 am

Element Name: MAN
Symbol: XY
Atomic Weight: (180+/-50)
Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.
Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KD (Element: Child) for prolonged periods of time. Neutralize by saturating with alcohol.
Usage: None known. Possible good methane source. Good specimens are able to produce large quantities on command.
Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell
.
Back to top Go down
The SAINT
LMAO! Platinum member
LMAO! Platinum member
The SAINT


Posts : 736
Join date : 2007-11-03
Age : 114
Location : hoping i can come back soon.........

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: Re: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitimeSun Nov 25, 2007 2:45 am

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Poof
Back to top Go down
FunModeAdmin
LMAO!
LMAO!
FunModeAdmin


Posts : 614
Join date : 2007-07-23
Age : 53
Location : Helsinki FINLAND

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: Re: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitimeSun Nov 25, 2007 10:53 am

The SAINT wrote:
Fairly dense and sometimes flaky.

Difficult to find a pure sample.

Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.

Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get.

Also tends to form strong bonds with itself.

Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell
.

THE ones which made me ROFLMFAOOOOO
Back to top Go down
https://lmao.forumotion.com AND www.myspace.com/thepolicyoftruth
FunModeAdmin
LMAO!
LMAO!
FunModeAdmin


Posts : 614
Join date : 2007-07-23
Age : 53
Location : Helsinki FINLAND

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: Re: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitimeSun Nov 25, 2007 10:54 am

The SAINT wrote:
A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Poof

YEAH YEAH ... AS IF Razz Razz Razz
Back to top Go down
https://lmao.forumotion.com AND www.myspace.com/thepolicyoftruth
The SAINT
LMAO! Platinum member
LMAO! Platinum member
The SAINT


Posts : 736
Join date : 2007-11-03
Age : 114
Location : hoping i can come back soon.........

A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: Re: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitimeSun Nov 25, 2007 9:46 pm

and your an expert driver now.....FMA.....LMAO !
Back to top Go down
Sponsored content





A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Empty
PostSubject: Re: A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN   A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN Icon_minitime

Back to top Go down
 
A WOMEN'S GUIDE TO MEN
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» A MAN'S GUIDE TO WOMEN
» good wife guide aye right
» Idiots guide to learning Chinese....

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
 :: LMAO FunMode FORUM :: Jokes :: Male-
Jump to: